The Beauty (and sheer glamour) of Selling Lightbulbs

So I got a call from a light bulb company looking for someone who would like to sell for them for free. That means: Commission only.

At first I got a tentative email, I looked at the site and it was obviously a site designed NOT to sell a product but to sell a salesperson on selling the product. So I first wrote the recruiter who'd contacted me and said:

Thank you so much for reaching out to me! I've looked over the site and it appears to have been designed specifically to reach out to salespeople. So this begs the obvious question: Is this commission only?

She answered back:

The compensation is a combination of commission and bonuses and will pay between 27 to 34%

She lied. Or, you could say, she was honestly dishonest. Once she trapped me on the phone, extolling the virtues of lightbulbs, I asked her about the pay (straight commission and an independent contractor, no benefits) and finally queried: "Do you provide leads?" 

"Oh ANY business is your lead," she said enthusiastically. 

"By THAT standard, why don't you sell Post-it-Notes, too?" I asked tartly.

And that was that.

This is the quality of the jobs out there in Florida.