The Rental Car Accident

My car had to go back to the shop on Friday (I think my mechanic is having an affair with it, because there's really no reason that the AC should continue to have problems since it's been almost completely gutted and rebuilt!)

So what to do? Naturally I chose to rent a car. Again.

I got a good deal from Hotwire and luckily I got Avis. In my experience, Avis is the best of the rental car companies (and I rent cars often). As I've said in the past, you are a fool if you rent from Enterprise Rent-A-Car (ERAC). To read of my experiences with ERAC, go here.

However, the prices for rental cars this weekend were the worst I've seen in years. The rental car companies tell me they don't know why - all they know is that they're as shocked as anyone to see economy cars for $99 a day! I got mine at $35 a day (usually the price of a mid-size sedan) and I considered myself lucky.

So Friday morning I toodled off in a tiny 2008 Chevy Cobalt from Avis. (NOTE: Do NOT buy a Chevy Cobalt unless you're OK with zero leg room in the back for the passengers. Although you could fit someone ON the back seat, they cannot have legs).

Saturday I picked up my friend John. We were to grab lunch and go to a local art show. It was pouring rain by the bucketful.

We were on a little road leading out of a mobile home park and restaurant, sitting still, waiting for the massive Toyota Tundra in front of us to turn right.

While we were waiting, I was glancing down idly when suddenly John yelled "Look out! He's backing up!!!"

I looked up in time to see the truck back up ON TO MY HOOD.

My mouth dropped in disbelief. Luckily the driver figured out what had happened and pulled the truck forward immediately, because I was in such shock that I wasn't thinking clearly enough to get out of the car in time (if the truck had rolled over us completely).

We all popped out of our vehicles. The woman who had been driving was a tall, slender blond with spiked hair. She was wearing a gay pride t-shirt, denim jeans, and sneakers. She came running back to me. "Oh my god," she gasped, "is everyone OK?"

"Yes, are you OK?" I asked, and I gave her a hug. She was shaking.

"Yes," she gulped. "I am SO sorry! This isn't my truck - it's my friend's truck, and I'm not really familiar with how to drive it!"

"Thank goodness you admitted it," I said, "because this is a rental and I only have my own insurance on it. Since you've admitted it, your insurance will cover it. Thank you, thank you!"

She (we'll call her "Ellen") nodded unhappily. John told us to wait there, and he would call 911 to get the Florida Highway Patrol out to take the report (The FHP takes reports for minor fender benders).

Rain poured over us, soaking my Polo shirt and making my jeans smell like old canvas. Even taking shelter in the car gave me little comfort, and the car interior was coated in a fine mist of rain.

Suddenly Ellen realized that she didn't have her drivers license. She ran over to my car, stuck her head in the window, and asked to jot down her information. She said she was running home to get the license as she didn't want to be ticketed for not being in posession of it. Ellen also said she had her 4-year old daughter with her.

John and I pointed out that she might get ticketed for leaving the scene of the accident, but she said she'd rather take her chances. We dubiously took all the information she cared to give us, and I jotted down her license plate.

We waited about an hour for the police to arrive. About then, Ellen showed up again with her license and without her daughter. We had just called the FHP and discovered that we had a wait time of up to several hours! So the three of us discussed the potentially long wait and called the local sheriff's office instead. They obligingly sent out a car.

However, when the deputy began to take our information, Ellen suddenly developed 'amnesia' and couldn't remember exactly what happened (obviously she was told by someone to admit to nothing). Luckily I had a witness: Can you imagine what mess I would be in if I didn't have one?!

It was bad enough as it was.

Because we were on private property (and not a public road), all the deputy could do was to take down our information. When an accident is on private property, the police will not assess blame or hand out tickets, which can make it harder to fight a claim.

Ellen might have been worried because her insurance had expired. However, Avis will be going after the insurance belonging to the owner of the truck, who happens to be a relatively wealthy woman who owns her own company in the Tampa Bay Area. I actually know the woman, distantly. We'll call her "Amy".

This morning I ran into repeated snags. First, I had to go to the Sheriff's office to get the information in person. Once I had acquired that information, I called Amy's insurance company (Geico). They told me that the policy was non-existant, so I left a message for Ellen asking her for the correct information.

Ellen text-messaged me, saying "Sorry about the wrong info - not at all intentional. Amy can be reached at xxx-xxxx. if her ins isnt cooperative - please let me know what the estimate is."

(Happily, that sounds as if she's understood that she will have to take responsibility for the accident. I was not looking forward to the time and expense of a small-claim court case.)

So, instead of pestering Amy I tried again, and got a more experienced operator this time. She told me that Geico recently changed some policy numbers and when she did a little searching, she was able to locate Amy's information the second time around.

I spent the next couple of hours filing claims with Geico, with my insurance company (just in case Avis went to them first), and with Avis.

I'm happy to say that Avis and the insurance companies were very professional and nice about the whole thing. I'm just hoping that we can get this solved as quickly as possible. I'm also very greatful that no one was hurt. And now I can add a new experience to my resume: I've been backed over by a Toyota Tundra.

And what can you learn from this experience? Take the car rental insurance that waives your deductible fee even if you have rental car insurance on your policy. If *I* had, I wouldn't have been sweating over this as much as I did ...since my deductible is $500.

Ask Me About My Monkey

Today I decided to go grocery shopping at Sweetbay, which is the newest supermarket chain to pop up in this market. I only had a couple of things to buy, so I quickly ended up at the cash register.

The girl who was waiting on me was a slender blond girl who was complaining to everyone that she was on a diet and her stomach hurt. When it was my turn to be rung up, I cast about for a different conversational topic and was startled to find that she was wearing a pin above her right breast that read "Ask me about my monkey."

I did a double take! Yup, sure enough: That's what it said.

"Er, your pin says to... ask you about your monkey...?" I said hesitantly.

"Oh yeah, that," she said in the latest perky Popular Girl accent (which always sounds vaguely nasal to me). "Ya know, I've been getting a lot of funny looks about this pin! I guess it does sound rather salacious."

Yup, she said salacious: I was surprised! Give the girl some brownie points for using the word and a bonus for knowing what it meant!

"We all have to say something for that badge," she continued.

I looked a little more carefully and could see that the badge was a pre-printed one which has "Ask me about" printed above, and then you have to fill in the blank below with something you like to talk about. Since all of the writing on the badge is mechanically printed, I am guessing they must do it using a printer in the back office. I'm sure this is management's attempt to make the experience a little more personal.

"OK," I said. "And... your monkey?"

"Oh, I have a ring-tailed lemur," she answered. "Now of course I realize that I should've had them put "Ask me about my pet monkey." Oh well." She shrugged a little bashfully.

And I wondered what sort of manager would let a young blond girl leave his office with a tag like that.

A salacious one, I'll bet.

Our Food Supply

In May of 2006, I wrote an article on the FDA, and their inability to protect us in everything from our medicines to our meats.

In March of 2007, I wrote an article on the dangers in our food supply.

This is becoming an annual event. Like a zombie in a low-grade horror flick, this issue just won't die.

Now, of course, we have the largest meat recall in history and I still see a lack of panic in the press! And despite the war, the elections, and the economy, our food supply should truly be the #1 concern in the minds of every American as it affects each and every one of us like nothing else does; from the very young to the very old.

Some of the press are eagerly writing that there is no discernible illness detected as a result of this SNAFU. Well of course there isn't. YET.

If these cows were afflicted with mad cow disease, and people injested the meat, then it can take years for them to evince the symptons of Creutzfeldt-Jakob Disease* (the human variant of mad cow disease). And there is no escaping Creutzfeldt-Jakob Disease: Once the symptoms begin, it's a rapid death sentence.

Once again, we see how our foods are imperilled. Once again, will we choose to ignore it?


* There are two types of Creutzfeldt-Jakob Disease (CJD): The classic (which appears more commonly among the elderly) and Variant Creutzfeldt-Jakob Disease (vCJD) which appears in younger people. It is more likely that vCJD would be acquired through eating the meat of a mad cow. However, don't be gladdened by this: The symptoms are the same.

Encourage Canada to Become a Refuge

From March 13th through the 16th, disenchanted veterans from the Afghanistan and Iraq wars will be in front of Congress, testifying to the atrocities they've seen. They will, hopefully, make a powerful case for immediate withdrawal. You can read more on this upcoming event at IVAW (Iraq Veterans Against the War).

As with Vietnam, this will surely stir up a great deal of anger on both sides. There will be people who call these soldiers mere cowards but when you hear a little bit of what they've seen, you will understand that they have been forced to view a very different version of the war than what the Bush administration would care to admit. If you'd like to hear what they have to say, there's a video on their front page.

Sadly, many of these troups cannot stomach the war any longer. They say they have seen too little good and too much hypocrisy. However, due to an agreement between Canada and the US government, there is no more refuge to be found in Canada. And, without Canada, there is no escape for the conscientious objector who can be forced back into combat situations or punished severely for refusing to fight.

Certainly Mexico is no friend to the US citizen: They send their own citizens to compete with us in our homeland, and have a tacit agreement with the US government which allows this to continue. No refuge is possible in Mexico. But there still might be in Canada! Nearly two of three Canadians are in favor of U.S. war resisters being allowed to stay according to a recent poll. And yet, the Canadian government still abides by their agreement to send back all conscientious objectors and deserters.

If you would like to do something to help these conscientious objectors, go to Courage to Resist and sign the letter and make a donation, or copy the letter, personalize it, and email it to:

1. Prime Minister Stephen Harper at pm@pm.gc.ca

2. Minister of Citizenship and Immigration Diane Finley at Minister@cic.gc.ca

3. Stéphane Dion, Liberal Party, at Dion.S@parl.gc.ca

Local Police Abuse Wheelchair-Bound Man

By now many of you have heard of the wheelchair-bound man that was abused by our local sheriffs. If you haven't, you can catch the story here.

The Story in a Nutshell: A Tampa Sheriff deputy arrested Brian Sterner, a quadriplegic, on a traffic violation and hauled him into their headquarters. She claims she didn't believe him to be a quadriplegic, but it is obvious that there is a great deal of spite when you see the video which shows Brian being dumped out of his wheelchair.

The deputies involved say that this was the easiest way to frisk him. Anyone who has retained any humanity will be instantly disgusted when they view the cavalier treatment that Brian is subjected to. Perhaps those who participated merely despise and discriminate against the handicapped (this would be my guess).

I have a friend who's wheelchair-bound and he says he is continually disrespected. There have been many times when he has been at the store, waiting in line, when people take advantage of him by butting in front! He thinks they do this because they're under the impression that he's retarded. (He is only 41 but had a stroke a couple of years ago which almost killed him and left him with speech and movement difficulties.) But if they're treating him poorly because they think he's retarded, it is certainly no excuse (although it may be a reason).

This Sherriff's deputy is a black woman, and the victim is an emaciated white man. I can guarantee you that if their roles had been reversed, Jesse Jackson would be down here hollering for the news crews. But shouldn't he be just as incensed over this obvious discrimination?!

Deputy Charlette Jones has been suspended during the investigation. (Note the illiterate spelling; this isn't my mistake. She has her parents to thank, apparently).

Two others (who witnessed her actions and even walked away snickering) have also been placed on leave. Of course Charlette should be fired and prosecuted for abuse. A fitting sentence would be to fasten her legs to a wheelchair for a year. Perhaps she would learn what it's like to be subject to true discrimination.

Of course at the end of the year, Charlette would be able to walk again. Too bad her victim doesn't have the same future.

The Christian Book Store

I was browsing in a Christian bookstore yesterday, as I had a little time to kill. They're going out of business, and I was hoping to pick up a discounted children's Bible for a friend who would like to have one.

I had made it halfway through the store when some voices I'd been hearing faintly were raised significantly. I came across three women having a political discussion. It was heating up, and now the entire store rang with the echoes of their voices.

There were two white women and one black woman. Most of the 'discussion' was really one-sided, and was being carried on loudly by a skinny white woman with an earnest, pinched face, glasses perched on her nose, and gray hair pulled severely back into a braided pony tail. She resembled an anxious librarian.

"I'm telling you," she announced shrilly, "That the Holy Spirit himself told me that Barack Obama is demon possessed!"

This announcement was met with long "Ohhhhhs" as the other women took it all in, nodding in approval.

She continued "YES! He is in the clutches of the Devil! There is not a Christian out there that should vote for that man! Hillary's not much better, but if Barack gets the nomination, it's over for us as a nation! It is! Why, I voted for Huckabee and he is a God-Fearin' man! But the Holy Spirit told me, he told me himself, that Barack Obama is pure eeeevil! And there are more black people that should be getting behind me on this! Black people could sway the election if they would just wake up! They're more worried about race than if he's a good candidate!"

The others made various approving noises, and it continued on in that vein for a while.

Although the woman was obviously a cuckoo short of a clock, I do have to confess that I did vote for Huckabee and am leery of Obama's ties to the Muslim faith. But as I listened to this woman drone on at the top of her lungs, I watched other customers moving about the store, skirting the three women like skittish colts.

This had been going on for at least 10 minutes by the time I'd had enough. I couldn't even concentrate enough to find the book I was looking for and customers were leaving the store. Those women were obviously aggressively determined to cram their views down everyones' throats, like it or not.

Finally I shouted (I had to shout in order to be heard over the woman) "Ladies! Ladies! Is this discussion really appropriate in the middle of the Bible store? What's the Bible verse about not offending your lesser brethren...? There may be some people who are not in agreement with you here, and you are being needlessly loud and offensive!"

The other white woman straightened up, said loudly "Well! I would've thought that surely here everyone would be in agreement!!!"

I have never had the experience of someone looking down their nose at me before, but she drew herself up, puffed out her chest, straightened her chin, and peered at me in the same manner as a hungry chicken peering at a worm.

"Uh huh," I said in a mild tone edged with steel, "I guess there's no knowing, is there?"

She snorted, wheeled about on one heel, and marched up to the front of the store: I kid you not. It was almost comical.

The black woman shot me an apologetic look and quietly vaporized. I was left alone with the librarian.

"Well!" she also gasped, tossing her braid to the side, "I don't know about you, but the Holy Spirit told me this himself, and *I* LISTEN to God!"

"Well," I retorted, "it might have been a spirit, but are you sure you were listening to the Holy Spirit?!"

At this her eyes goggled and she hollered "I KNOW my LORD! I KNOW his VOICE! I KNOW what he is SAYing to ME! I have a PERsonal reLAYshunship with MY LORD!"

"Great!" I said cheerfully. "Isn't that nice? How wonderful for you!" I stepped away from her and went back to browsing among the books.

To this she could have no further reply, so she stomped off angrily.

There was a refreshing, supreme peace for a couple minutes while I began to scan the titles again. It was broken by a tap on my shoulder. I turned to see a tiny little old lady at my elbow.

"You're my hero," she said in a thin, quavery voice before she tottered off into another aisle.

As I left the bookstore, I saw the librarian on duty behind the cash register. Now I know why they're going out of business.

I wonder if the owner knows, too?

In the Bible, it says that the only unforgiveable sin is blasphemy against the Holy Spirit, which results in a straight ticket to hell. I hope the librarian is weighing her words.

The Economic Stimulus Package

First a little housecleaning:

1) If you participate in Ebay at all, please sign this petition and join the boycott.

2) I was quite surprised when Mitt Romney stepped down. I see only marginal differences between McCain and Hillary and I will vote for Hillary if McCain takes the nomination. I am, by the way, a moderate Republican but I am liberal in areas McCain is conservative in, and conservative in areas he's liberal in. I feel no connection whatsoever with John McCain and am not one of those do-or-die party loyalists. (I'm not mentioning Huckabee here because I don't think he has a chance. I would have voted for Romney in the Presidential elections, which might surprise some of you).
It's a Friday morning in February and the fog and gloom is outdoors and it seems to permeate the day.

Yesterday I dropped off a few business checks at the bank and stopped by a major outlet store where I often find good deals to sell on Ebay.

As I am a regular, I have made 'friends' with some of the employees there and we often chat about miscellaneous things as I shop. This time I was speaking with William, an 81 year old man with a sparkling wit. I adore William, and would marry him in a minute if he weren't already married and 81 years old. William is one of those rare men with a marvellous personality that lights up a room. I have never asked what he did for a living, but I assume it somehow involved interracting with the public.

William was rather grim that day, however. Somehow the discussion fell upon the economy (perhaps because there were so few shoppers there). He told me that he and his wife were seriously discussing cutting back and saving. We discussed the reasons for doing so. We also discussed the conundrum Americans as a whole face: Should they be spending or saving instead?

Of course we are told we can't stop spending. The new economic stimulus package which was passed yesterday is created based on the hope that spending will increase with a better tax refund.

On the other hand, some pundits are pointing out that people lose jobs during recessions and depressions and they're recommending that everyone start saving for the potential lay-offs.

What to do?

There are no easy answers right now, but personally I am leaning toward cutting back on spending for now.

Meanwhile, it's fine to give us back some of our money, but it doesn't alter the fact that we're in terrible debt as a nation. Is Congress also going to stop all this horrific spending?! They're spending money like a lottery-winner in a whorehouse. Until they can control themselves, the root of the problem will continue to exist: Trim the tree down to the ground, but you haven't destroyed it until you've uprooted it.

McCain, Romney, and Huckabee

Why are people voting for Huckabee over Romney? By now, it had been predicted that Huckabee would be no more than a fleabite on the hide of the Big Elephant.

At this point, most conservatives dislike McCain (which is why over 60% of the vote is going elsewhere). *I* am moderate, but I am moderate in the areas McCain is not, and I am conservative in the areas in which he is liberal. Apparently many Republicans agree with me, so McCain may not be electable. If the race comes down to McCain vs. Clinton or Obama, many of us will throw the election to the Democratic candidate because the difference is negligable and we'd like some true change and a fresh party in the White House may be just what we need.

The Republican candidate needs to be distinctively different from the Democrats if he's to garner Republican loyalty. Despite popular opinion, I don't think McCain can win. So we are left with two candidates: Huckabee or Romney.

Before I say any more on this subject, I'd like to make a caveat. I have some friends and acquaintances who are Mormons, and I have nothing at all against them. A fellow blogger (3 Score & 10) is a good family man, interesting writer, and someone I am always happy to see over here at my blog. My favorite talk show is Glenn Beck (a Mormon), and generally Glenn Beck represents my views over 90% of the time.

However, Mormons are still considered to be misled (at best) or a cult (at worst) by many people. There are few (if any) Protestants or Catholics who will place them in the category of "Christian", despite Mormon protests to the contrary. As is commonly said, "If I stand in a garage and call myself a car, I'm still not a car."

This religion has beliefs that deviate greatly from the mainstream such as:

1) Jesus and Satan are brothers (see renowned Mormon John A. Widtsoe's work Evidences and Reconciliations, Pg.209).

2) It's OK to marry multiple wives (even though some of the Mormon leadership backed away from this doctrine eventually because too many of them were getting into legal trouble). Their church split over this doctrine, and hardcore Mormons still practice polygamy.

3) There have recently been many books out on the wide-spread child molestation that goes on in the Mormon culture. Yeah, yeah, the Catholic church has also had it's share of child molesters. However, we're dealing with a flaw in the Mormon church at the moment. We can table the discussion of the Catholic church's failings for now.

I do want to point out that the molestation in the Catholic church primarily revolves around their priests. As for the Mormon church: Although there have been cases in which boys have claimed that they were molested by church leaders, there are many young girls who have reported being molested or are married off very young. Why? Because the Mormon religion has many loopholes which actually encourages this for some sick individuals. And, after all, if their founder (Joseph Smith) had multiple wives (some very young), it's difficult to argue against the practice.

Yes, the more modern Mormons (the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints or CLDS) are eager to distance themselves from the other branch of Mormonism (the Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints or FLDS) and I am sure that the FLDS has more victims of molestation. But the FLDS can rightly claim that they continue to follow their founder's teachings to the letter, and many people wonder how much CLDS really differs from FLDS.

It's one thing to have the head of the Senate be a Mormon, as the American people didn't elect him to head the senate. But when it comes to electing the head of the USA, most voters hesitate because of all this.

And that is where Mitt Romney's problems stem from. This may also be why Mike Huckabee is so adamantly opposed to him and so willing to hang in as long as he can. On the other hand, perhaps Huckabee simply dislikes Romney's polish and Ken doll good looks.

We now see that there are many voters who are also united in their dislike of Romney. And though there have been cries for Huckabee to quit, perhaps we need to honestly ask ourselves if Romney is electable.

The sad truth is that none of the candidates are our Dream Date.

Ebay Boycott

After my post yesterday, an anonymous fly-by posted this:

*IMPORTANT NOTICE*

Worldwide eBay Boycott February 18th through February 25th, 2008.

We the concerned eBay buyers and sellers on eBay are protesting eBays announced new fee increases and feedback policy changes. We do not believe that these changes will have any positive affect for buyers or sellers and will result in increased prices, less choices and disharmony within the eBay community.

We also are in complete agreement that eBay's policy of allowing dogs and cats to be sold on eBay in China for slaughter purposes is both cruel and inhumane and must be stopped immediately.

We urge all people's to not shop or sell on eBay during this worldwide boycott.

Please spread the word.

Thank you.

I checked into it, and the post is 100% valid. And yes, the part about Ebay allowing dogs and cats to be sold as food is shockingly TRUE. It's amazing to see Ebay kowtow for the almighty Yen.

In the past there's been talk of Ebay boycotts and they didn't pan out well. Some sellers said it would only hurt them and impact Ebay little to nothing at all. However, that's assuming that there aren't going to be enough pissed-off sellers to make it effective.

This time, I'm betting there are.

Yes, the boycott will hurt sellers for a week. But it's only a week! How many of us have taken vacation or had an illness that prevented us from listing for a week? And yet we survived it! We can do this.
And during that time, perhaps we will start selling on Amazon.com or Ebid.net and we'll do ourselves a favor by working with an ethical company who charges considerably less! After all, if the buyers know the sellers are elsewhere, they will surely follow.

I learned something new yesterday. Ebay's claim that they're dropping fees is deceptive. They'll actually be increasing their final charges, which will more than make up for the fee drop they're trumpeting. That means that not only will sellers be treated as garbage, but they'll also be charged more for the privilege.

Thanks, but no thanks, Ebay. I'm joining the boycott.

Ebay Gives Scammers the Green Light

Here's what I wrote to Ebay when they announced their recent policy change favoring buyers over sellers:

From what I'm reading, although our fees are going to be reduced, we will be further restricted to how we are allowed to judge our customers, is that correct?

Over the course of years of business on Ebay (both buying and selling) I have only experienced 1 or 2 deceptive sellers. However, I have encountered numerous buyers who feel that this is a great way to take advantage of someone who desperately needs their money and good will.

I have found that there are many more buyers who see the seller as an easy mark.

Now the majority of buyers are decent people - don't get me wrong. But in the course of selling, I have had a man substitute worn out, damaged glasses for the new ones I'd sent him and I was forced to take both the other glasses AND refund him his money. He got an exchange for free - at my expense.

I've also had a man from Australia who ordered and received a watch AND got his money back when he claimed he hadn't received it - even when I had proof of sending it!

I've also had a man who decided his watch needed a new battery, and therefore he demanded half-off an already amazingly good price on a brand new watch!

There are many other examples of buyer fraud that I can give you - this is just the tip of the iceberg. And yet if we are only allowed to give POSITIVE feedback in the future, the buyers will NEVER be accountable for such actions!!! How are you going to protect us? Reduced fees will not be enough!

Ebay's representative, "Matt", wrote back:

Thank you for writing eBay in regard to the site changes.

the fees changes will take place on February 20th, the feedback changes won't take effect until May.

In regards to feedback, i have enclosed quite a lot of information, so i apologize the email is lengthy, but I have included some scenarios with buyers and how you can protect yourself.

The current feedback system will be changed to a new system in May. The reasoning behind these changes are:

1. Current system is not adequately achieving a primary intent because its transparency makes some members reluctant to hold others accountable. Buyers fear Retaliatory feedback!
2. Buyers who receive negative feedback are more likely to leave the site more then any other reason. (Including Item not received or item not described disputes). We want to Retain Buyers to the site.
3. We will continue to evolve eBay's public and Private feedback system as Community makeup and marketplace dynamics evolve.
4. 50% of Sellers have a 10% feedback, 80% of Sellers have a 99.3% and above. The old feedback system is not adequate to differentiate Sellers. Our primary objective with feedback is for Buyers to be able to accurately assess Sellers.

Plus, nothing good comes from unfairly criticizing a buyer publicly. And frankly, I can?t think of another successful ecommerce business or retailer where the customer isn?t always right (at least publicly).

If a buyer threatens negative Feedback to demand more than what was promised in the item description (for example, the person wants overnight delivery but only paid for standard delivery), the seller should immediately report the buyer to eBay. If there is clear evidence
of extortion, eBay will take action. Buyers who show a pattern of such behavior will be suspended. If a buyer is suspended, any negative or neutral Feedback they left for others will be automatically removed.

Sellers should only file these complaints when a buyer asks for more than what is promised in the listing. Filing a false claim is a violation of eBay policy and may result in seller suspension.

If your buyer has failed to pay for an item, you should file an Unpaid Item (UPI) claim. If the buyer fails to respond to the UPI report, then any negative or neutral Feedback they have left for the particular transaction will be removed. If the buyer shows a pattern of such behavior and is suspended for UPI, all negative or neutral Feedback they left will be removed.

Sellers should only file a UPI claim when a buyer did not pay. Filing false UPI claims is a violation of eBay policy and may result in seller suspension.

If you believe you have received negative Feedback because a buyer has purchased an incorrect item and you do not have a return policy, we recommend the following:

- Let the buyer know about your selling policies.
- Review your listings to make sure your items are well described and your terms are clear and concise. Important information mentioned in excessively long descriptions can sometimes be overlooked.
- Remember that you'll never be able to please everyone 100% of the time.
- Some selling policies such as no refunds, limits on how a buyer may pay, descriptions that hide details in the fine print, and so on may increase your likelihood of receiving negative or neutral Feedback from a buyer.

We believe that we will reduce any imbalance in the Feedback system with these changes. Buyers will be able to more accurately assess sellers, and sellers will be protected from buyers who violate our policies (through the Unpaid Item system and other reporting) without risking a
reduction in good buyer activity.

The change in the Feedback system is designed to improve the eBay marketplace which should benefit both buyers and sellers. Improving the Feedback system should increase buyers' confidence making them trust sellers more.

It is my pleasure to assist you. Thank you for choosing eBay.

Sincerely,
Matt I.

eBay Customer Support

So I responded:

Matt (please share this with your supervisor),

WHEN are you guys going to understand that you need the SELLERS too? It is the SELLERS who pay the fees, even if an item doesn't sell, and you're on the side of everybody BUT us. You glossed over the problems I mentioned by breezily saying that Ebay punishes bad buyers IF a pattern is established. Well what if I'm the beginning of that pattern? I just take the hit for the greater good? Or what if they are only crooked SOMEtimes and I get that one time?

And who decides what is considered a 'pattern'? The person sitting behind a desk at Ebay whose pocketbook isn't affected in the least?! How nice to sit there in comfortable glory, dishing out judgements that do not impact you whatsoever.

When a buyer has negative feedback, a seller can make an informed judgement as to whether or not they should do certain things! For instance, I recently had a woman who hadn't paid for 2 weeks after the auction ended. After countless emails to her, and a reminder from Ebay, I closed the sales and she got two strikes. THEN she wrote, telling me she still wanted the goods and would pay if I'd remove the strike.

Luckily I'd already spoken w/ another seller who'd left this buyer bad feedback, and I discovered that this is a common pattern, and that the buyer DID pay the other seller AFTER receiving a strike, received the merchandise, and then lied to PayPal and said she had never received it. Happily the other seller had the delivery confirmation, but do *I* need to go through such a hassle? Heck no! I refused to change the ruling and resold the items to others!

You say you want to retain buyers. At what cost? At throwing the sellers to the wolves? What about the buyers that ARE scam artists? You just threw them the biggest bone in the world! And at whose expense? Ours, of course, because YOU get your money no matter what. You get your money even when there's an incident or problem. And when a problem DOES come up, most of the time you're on the buyer's side because it's EASIER for you guys.

What - do you not think sellers aren't catching on to this? Again, when you don't have SELLERS, you don't have buyers either. Apparently you are choosing sides - how is this right?!

As for the customer being always right - I was a retail manager for Macy's. We tried to believe that trite old chestnut in the early 90s and found, to our detriment and extreme losses, that it wasn't so. That's when we revised corporate policy. We had numerous accounts of customer fraud which affected our bottom line so severely that we had to rework much of our policies. The customer ISN'T always right. Especially when it's in an anonymous forum like Ebay.

You say you'd need 'clear evidence of extortion' in cases of buyer fraud. That would mean you would need to SEE the items sold, SEE the emails exchanged, and neither will usually happen. Also, trying to get someone from Ebay to listen or return emails is a frustrating and slow process at best.

Watch and see - the downfall of your business will be when the sellers finally have enough and you'll get to retain your buyers, but there will be nothing to buy.

What are you guys going to do when the sellers finally find an alternative to Ebay where they're treated with equality and respect?

There will ALWAYS be buyers, there won't always be sellers.

I know for a FACT that there are many sellers who are actively looking for another route to sell online. There are numerous disgruntled comments throughout the web.

Your rating method was the only way to protect ourselves, nominally, from the crooked buyer. Why allow for positive feedback at all then? Why bother with feedback at all when there is no alternative but positive?

The Rosetta Stone

I recently was given an older copy of the Rosetta Stone (the last version before this current one). I decided it was time to refresh my highschool Spanish, which was never put to effective use. After all, living in Florida: Land of Immigrants Both Legal and Illegal, Spanish is a handy thing to know.

But I wonder how much it will help me grow to a bilingual status? Glowing reviews tout it as an incredible tool used by military and corporations alike, which supposedly fully emerses the user in the language.

My son had been rather disdainful about it. "Yeah, I used it for a while," he said, "but it's just a lot of pictures and it's pretty simplistic."

Still, I was determined to give it a try. And, in the day that I've used it, I've deducted that mujer (pronounced moo-hair) means woman and coche (pronounced coach-ay) means car. I can even say "El coche es blanco". But I'm hoping that simple words which mean run, jump, woman, man, boy, girl, car, and (oddly) elephant, will be useful in everyday conversation.

I worry that this may give me a toddler's vocabulary but will hardly make me proficient enough to be regarded as communicative. Do I really want to devote myself to this just so I can sound fresh out of kindergarten?

Has anyone else had any experience with this program?

MLK Day

Last year I wrote about Martin Luther King in Heroes With Blemishes. But this year I'd like to tackle something else:

Why is it that schools and the post office are closed on Martin Luther King Day when they aren't on Washington and Lincoln's birthdays (as they once were)? Instead, we have combined their birthdays into one, calling it "Presidents Day". It's as if we've decided that these amazing men don't each deserve a holiday of their own.

If two great Presidents can be so disregarded, why are we making such a fuss over a man who was not even the leader of our nation? I'll grant you that he was 'a' leader, but hardly a leader as powerful as a U.S. President.

Before anyone cries 'racist' (as inevitably happens when a white person discusses a black issue) let me assure you that one of my very best friends is black. So please... table the label.

For the sake of argument, it could be said that although MLK was not as powerful as a President, he was certainly a major leader for black people in this country, and I would agree with that. But what about alternative icons such as Booker T. Washington who has no recorded instance of cheating on his wives (he was widowed twice) and also never plagiarized a single paragraph (unlike MLK)?

Is Booker T. Washington so far removed from our lowered standards that he seems like an almost fictional character?

What of George Washington Carver, who made contributions to not simply a small segment of society but to society as a whole, while serving as an upstanding role model? Is he also to be disregarded because he is simply 'old school' and our modern work ethic (or lack of it) cannot come close to his standards?

Sometimes it is easier to idolize people who are obviously flawed, in the subconscious belief that we are somewhat better in comparison. And when someone is only marginally better than we are, the goal seems more achievable. Yet shouldn't we hold up men and women who represent what we should be and not what we are? Shouldn't our heroes be men and women who have achieved accomplishments and lived honorably? I ask this of all the races.

Yet for many of us, our role models are Britney Spears, Paris Hilton, Donald Trump, Tom Cruise, and the latest contestants in American Idol. Again, we like our heroes to be flawed so that we can feel that they are, in some way, equal to or even less than we are.

Top athletes don't do this. You never hear of the athlete who is successful because his role model was the person who received the bronze medal in the Olympics. No! We all aspire to win the gold!

So why do we focus on the bronze medal winners in the human race?

Matchmaker, Matchmaker

If I were a true matchmaker, I'd have no clients. Word would get about quickly, and the only people who would come to me would be the people who wanted to know whom they should avoid at all costs.

Wednesday evening I made an introduction of an out-of-town wealthy, artistic jeweler to a creative, intelligent, and pretty friend of mine. Now that sounds like a winning combination on paper, doesn't it?! If I had a checklist, I would have written down all of his obvious traits and matched it to hers, and I would have found at least an 80% match!

However, this was truly the worst match I've ever made.

Since my friend looks like Lisa Kudrow, we'll call her "Lisa" here. He didn't actually look like anyone I've ever seen before. She likes older men, so he fit the bill. Although she's 44, he's in his 50s. He has cherubic cheeks, curly gray hair, a Tom Selleck mustache and smile, and a ready wit. However, his personality turned out to be so far from Tom Selleck that we'll call him Caligula instead.

We arranged to meet for a couple of drinks so that no one had to make any commitments and could escape at any time. Lisa hadn't been feeling well that day. "I can't come," she said frantically over the phone. "I've been under so much stress lately that my entire mouth has broken out into cold sores! I feel like crap!"

"Oh c'mon," I cajoled her. "It's only for a couple of drinks! You can leave right afterwards! And who knows - maybe a couple of drinks will cauterize everything! Remember, he's only in town for a couple of days and this could be The One!"

She fell for it: I could sell fire to Satan.

I then called Caligula. I cautioned him that she wasn't well. "Oh, what is it, a cold or something?" Caligula asked. Yup, it was something, I said. I added that she wouldn't be able to stay for long, but we could always meet up for dinner on Friday night if all worked out. He thought it was a great idea.

So that night my friend Rick and I arrived at the club to find he was already waiting for us, drink in hand. We had no way of knowing how much he'd already drunk, but he carried it well and we didn't suspect that he'd had more than one. He happily ordered a couple of drinks for us and we found a table to sit at while we visited and waited for Lisa to arrive.

Now let me add something here: I hate being drunk and I hate drunks, so my limit is always two drinks. A drunk person turns me off so much that I've been known to break dates when I see a guy get drunk, and then never call him back. My tolerance is exceedingly low. My idea of a good time is getting out, dancing, and not waking up with flu symptoms the next morning. I can't see why anyone would want otherwise.

We sat there and sipped on our drinks, leaning over to yell loudly in each other's ears in order to overcome the violently loud 70s and 80s dance music mix.

Lisa soon arrived, dressed casually and sauntering in with an unconsciously athletic gait. She looked pretty and was very friendly and chatty as she sat down. However, the loud music conspired against us and it was very difficult to interract.

Soon after she sat down, a man walked up to her, did a double-take, and gasped "Lisa?!"

"Ted?!" she said, startled. She turned to us and muttered something about how she knew someone she knew would spot her, and she excused herself to be polite and visit with Ted and his wife for a few moments before she returned to our table.

During that time, Caligula leaned over to us and announced that she met with his approval and he could certainly 'do her.' Questioning my hearing due to the loud music, I let it pass. Surely he didn't say anything that crude about my friend!

Lisa soon rejoined us, and we resumed chatting. Sometimes Caligula would get up and disappear for a couple of minutes and then rejoin us. Other than that, Lisa remained the focus of his attention.

As a little time went by, she grew glummer as her mouth grew more painful. Finally when nothing could be said to elicit a smile, I leaned over and said "Why don't you go on home, hon? Get some rest and we'll get together on Friday." Lisa nodded thankfully and Caligula jumped up with the offer that he'd walk her out to her car.

When Caligula got back, I said it was a shame that Lisa couldn't stay but we'd see her on Friday and we were looking forward to it. He nodded and said "Whatever! If it works, fine, if it doesn't, fine." Well that seemed open-minded and fair enough! Of course he said that as he was gaping at a tiny hispanic woman walking by.

"Careful! Don't snap your neck, Caligula!" joked Rick. Caligula grinned and then promptly went after her. He moved as quickly as a horse out of the starting gate.

Rick and I exchanged glances. "You know he has a drinking problem, right?" said Rick.

"WHAT?" I gasped, "No?! Why do you say that?"

"Have you noticed how he's periodically gotten up and disappeared?" asked Rick. I nodded yes. "Well, he's been going up to the bar and ordering an extra drink every chance he gets," said Rick.

"No, no - really?!" I said in shock (my back had been to the bar the entire time). Rick just nodded.

Soon Caligula was back, for a brief moment, before he spotted another good looking woman and went high-tailing it after her.

"Well, you've gotta admit he's got stamina," said Rick.

For Caligula, the third time was the charm. He found a blond lady who was very receptive to him, and he came staggering back to tell us that he was going home with her. I had enough at this point and said with false cheeriness "Well then, Caligula, have fun, be safe, talk to you later! We were just about to go. Ready, Rick?"

It was at this point that Caligula leaned in to me, and in a stage whisper he announced that he was great in bed and was fabulous at oral sex, and he wanted to show me just how fabulous he was. Well... that's a sanitized version of what he said.

"OK, then, gotta go!" I chirped, dragging Rick out of his chair. "See ya, Caligula!" I said, waving as we backed out the door.

As I turned to look at Rick, I saw that he had had one drink too many. He wasn't nearly as drunk as Caligula, but he wasn't sober, either. "Did I just hear him say...?" began Rick.

"Don't worry about it," I said hastily. "The guy is drunk and doesn't know what he's saying."

I stuffed Rick into the car and drove away. However, for the next couple of miles, Rick was angry and agitated. Finally he insisted on getting out of the car and walking back to the bar. I honestly told him he was a complete idiot and my honor hardly needed defending (I can defend it just fine, thank you) but off he went, and I went home.

At home I went through my usual routines. I let out the dogs, we curled up with a good book, and I read for a couple of hours. I wasn't worried - Rick can take care of himself, and he's really not the type to get into a brawl.

At 12:30 I got a call from the local Holiday Inn. It was Rick.

"Rick? What are you doing at the Holiday Inn?!" I asked.

"Can you pay for a cab?" Rick asked wearily. He'd left his wallet behind at his place. "No," I said, "I'll come get you instead. What the heck's happened?"

"Well, I went back to the club, saw that Caligula really was drunk, and he was about to leave." Apparently Caligula's one-night stand fizzled out and by then Rick had sobered up and got worried about the guy. So Rick continued "I told him I needed a ride home and I'd drive his car to his hotel if he'd just arrange to get me a cab. When we got to his hotel, he staggered in and headed for the elevator. I told him "Hey, Caligula, I still need you to pay for my cab ride home!" Caligula said "F-you, I've got no money," got on the elevator, and disappeared!" said Rick.

In my opinion, Rick got what he deserved and I told him so. However, I said I was on my way. I had nothing better to do, and the Victorian ghost stories I was reading were keeping me awake.

When I arrived at the hotel, the situation had worsened. Caligula had come back down on the elevator, saw Rick, and said in great, drunken surprise "What are you doing here?!"

"I'm still waiting for my cab, remember?" said Rick, irritatedly. "You were supposed to pay for it!"

At this point, Caligula erupted into great profanity and grew very aggressive, coming after Rick with his chest bowed out and fists clenched. Rick hollered to the desk clerk that he was a witness to the fact that Caligula was being the aggressor and if Rick had to flatten him right there, he wanted to make sure that everyone knew he hadn't thrown the first punch.

The hotel clerk cowered behind the desk, only shrieking out that if Caligula didn't leave immediately and return to his room, he was going to call the police. The clerk retold the story to me later, shuddering a little as he did so.

Caligula stumbled back to the elevator like a punch-drunk bear and disappeared just before I arrived.

The next day Caligula called me and left me a message. "I don't know what was wrong with Rick last night!" he whined. "He became so aggressive! I really think he needs anger management classes. Call me!"

Yeah, I'll call him. I'll call him when hell freezes over and I get Satan to buy fire from me. Yessir! We got fire! We got all kinds o' fire! We have red fire, orange fire, candle fire and wood fire. We even got a special on that fabulous blue fire - you know, the kind that accompanies all the undead...

Things Are Looking Up

Well, at the risk of jinxing things, I must say that things are looking up. I saw an ad online for a part-time sales rep, which would suit me perfectly. I contacted the owner and was called back within minutes. He wants to meet with me on Friday, so we'll see if we like each other. However, it's encouraging to know that the only job I bit at was the job that bit back.

Also, client sign-ups seem to be on the increase. However, this could be the last hurrah for the season, so I'm not counting my chickens until they're hatched (as my grandmother would've said). I also think I have my nemesis on the run, as a recent development has occurred which may show just how conniving he's been with my accounts.

While I was on a shopping trip for my Ebay business this weekend, I chanced across a brilliant jewelry artist who makes fantastic handmade, hand-hammered thick silver beads which are tubes of various sizes, embellished with 14K gold. He has a wonderful and engaging personality, and I immediately realized he could be a perfect match for a single friend that I have. I mentioned her, got them both on the phone, and he's coming in to town today to meet her. To make it less high-pressure, we'll do a group date and see how the evening progresses. I adore matchmaking, even though I am notoriously bad at it. Let's hope I'm lucky this time. If it's a disaster, you'll know about it on Friday.

Last night, auditions were announced for the game show "Jeopardy". I never watch TV, so I know vaguely that Jeopardy is all about trivia questions. My boyfriend begged me to go and so I dressed up like a dowager duchess and was dragged to the Hard Rock Cafe in Tampa, where traffic was at a total standstill. By the time we got in, the last people had been admitted for auditions that night. We gave up and went home. So much for an interesting story! Ah well - you win some, you lose some, and I'm sure that this is one loss on the way to a big win, so I'm not complaining.

Maybe next time I'll get a chance to be on Wheel of Fortune. Or... is that still on TV?

Saur & The Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Quarter

There's a kid's book called "Alexander and The Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day." Mine has stretched into 3 months. Now that doesn't mean that the sky is falling. I'm not ruined or destitute. I'm not ready to sell everything and live like a hermit in a cave.

Yet.

But the economy is affecting my particular industry, and it's affecting it quite horribly. And losing my so-called 'friend' was very saddening. The friend I'm speaking of is the one that I mentioned here. To make it even worse, I will share something with you that I hadn't shared before: It's my old friend and assistant, Zen Buddhist. The fact that my friendship and help meant so little to her has been very, very disheartening.

My sales aren't horrible, but I went through a very dry period.

In addition to struggling sales, there has been a guy (in the company that I do business with) who is determined to undermine me as much as he possibly can. And that's a lot.

This guy has repeatedly done what he could to covertly take business away from me, and has openly told people who work for him that this is to be standard procedure.

Why doesn't he like me? Without getting into it too much, I'll simply say that I was very popular, highly efficient, and had placed over $50 million in sales with the company. He apparently views this as threatening and rather uppity for a woman. I can't help my gender or my efficiency.

I also can't help being well-liked. In fact, so many people (in that company) like me that he once joked that I was becoming a placement service for all his disenfranchised employees. It's true: I find good people good jobs once they leave.

But I can't find the right job for me. Yet.

Also I'm tired of being used and so many people have come to the well that it's almost dry now.

Should I have known better? Perhaps. But there are always the bright and shining moments, the loyal friends who remember, and golden times spent with people who are truly of value.

My current difficulty is finding time to get everything done. Right now I'm working double time to keep my head above water, and I'm getting so tired of treading. I'm beginning to think it's time to look into a part time job, which will supplement my income and get me out of the house again.

But what?

I thought of bartending (even though I rarely drink and am allergic to cigarette smoke) or doing something menial in retail. Frankly, I have degrees that I don't find to be of value. Companies see the degrees and experience and immediately think I'm overqualified.

Perhaps I am.

But if I'm overqualified, then what is my other option? What does someone with a vast portfolio do for work at the age of 41?

I don't know anymore.

But I know my life is crazy wonderful.

Slamming the Ebay Scammer

I thought I'd share an amusing piece of Ebay drama that I went through a couple of days ago with a deadbeat buyer we'll call Pinkie.

Pinkie had purchased two high-end items and then didn't pay. I sent her repeated invoices for 7 days and reported her to Eaby as a dead-beat bidder on the 8th day. 7 more days went by, with me invoicing her daily. On the 16th day, I reported her again, the sale was voided, and she was given two 'strikes' (which means it goes on her record and an accumulation of strikes can stop her from participation in Ebay).

That night, when Pinkie found out that she couldn't continue to ignore me forever, she thought she'd be clever and shoot me a PayPal payment for the items. She then wrote to me and told me that she had paid for them and still wanted them. I wrote back and politely told her that once a customer has chosen to not pay for an item and I've had to go to the trouble of waiting for two weeks and reporting her, constant invoicing, etc., I'd prefer to not do business with her.

What Pinkie didn't know is that I contacted another seller who had left her negative feedback for being a dead-beat buyer. Pinkie had pulled the same trick on her, and when the seller left truthful feedback, Pinkie left retributive feedback claiming that the seller simply hadn't seen her payment. So, I knew Pinkie was a liar and manipulative as well.

And so the fun began.

Pinkie wrote back to me:

If you have no intention of having the Unpaid Item Strike removed and of completing the transaction (which would be the PROFESSIONAL way of handling this matter, since you have several of these watches) then please refund my Paypal payment immediately. Otherwise I will have no choice but to file fraud reports with Paypal, Ebay, and law enforcement (by the way - my father is a sitting Judge and my brother is an attorney and senior partner in a law firm.) Your choice.

I replied:

Ah, that's what I like: A buyer with complete unprofessionalism, lack of conscience, lack of social graces, and the belief that everyone needs to kowtow to them. Please give your scary relatives a friendly hello from us, and wish them a Happy New Year. Unlike you, on New Year's Eve we have places to go and don't have time to babysit our business 24/7. I have a feeling His Honor might understand that. Oh, and congratulations to your most-impressive brother. Perhaps you might want to follow in his footsteps and make something of yourself as well. Don't think we'll make the same mistake that [other seller] made: We play only as nice as YOU do.

Pinkie then wrote:

No, I'm just a lowly department head in city administration with 2 university degrees, not an Ebay peddler. A formal complaint will be filed by fax on Wednesday morning, 2 January, to: Pinellas County Department of Consumer Protection 14250 49th ST. N. 2nd Floor, Clearwater, FL 33762. From there it will be processed for criminal prosecution for internet fraud, since you have obviously stolen funds with no intention of delivering the items. Full reports will be submitted to both Ebay and Paypal so that they will be aware of the criminal actions being taken against you. You have obvously made your choice, Ms PROFESSIONAL. Enjoy.

I replied:

Do threats and bullying normally work for you? I suppose there are many sheeples who fall for it. With so many relatives in law, I'd think you'd realise how well that looks with law-enforcement and what Ebay's rules are concerning bullying. Of course you've put it all in writing (thank you). As I said previously, when we get the chance, we will delve into the matter and if you paid us (in an obvious attempt to manipulate the situation) then we'll refund you the money. After we were forced to report you as a deadbeat bidder, the deal is no longer valid - as you know: We see this is a habit with you. Dropping names and addresses doesn't impress me in the least - I could certainly do the same, but I have more class than you (apparently). Perhaps you might consider Charm School or, at the very least, anger management. Surely you could excel at both, right? After all, you already have 2 degrees, so you're a quick learner.

Pinkie chewed this one over for about 15 minutes. Then she decided to let loose. At this point, her manic obsessive-compulsive side started to take over and she sent me THREE emails (one of them being a copy of her PayPal payment which I won't bother to share with you here):

Pinkie's First Response:

You're the one who's stated in writing that you have no intention of delivering items, although you've been paid. Check your email and you'll see. Also check your paypal account rather than harassing me. Best wishes to you - why didn't you simply have the Unpaid Item Strikes removed and complete the transaction, as I cordially requested that you do, rather than becoming so vicious and lying about receiving a Paypal payment? Does it give you a thrill?

Pinkie's Second Note:

No threats or bullying, [my real name here]. Simply a statement of what WILL happen.

Ahhh... So here she is using my REAL name in an attempt to show me that I'm vulnerable and she knows who I am and where I live. This type of neurotic individual is rather easy to read. So, I shot her my reply:

[Pinkie's Real Name], I am growing increasingly concerned about your mental health and well-being due to your peculiar allegations and obsessiveness. I strongly suggest you see a doctor and get a complete psychiatric work-up. Simply because you're educated doesn't mean that you can't be afflicted with mental illness and perhaps you should consider this to be a possibility. Either that, or you are poor at the game of lying and manipulations. Lying and accusing me of things that didn't happen won't make a difference to Ebay, PayPal, or any judge or jury in the land when they can see the email trail.

TO SUM IT UP: Our policy is clear - pay within three days of winning the item(s). 8 days after the auction closed, after repeated attempts to get you to pay or respond to the invoices (all documented), we reported you to Ebay. 8 days after THAT, again with repeated attempts to contact you, we finally were forced to ask Ebay to close both sales and issue us a credit. In order to issue us a credit, Ebay also gives a 'strike' to the buyer.

Tonight, when you finally discovered that ignoring your obligations wasn't working, you made the decision to pay us in the hopes that we would buy your excuses (which you've made to other sellers before).

We don't buy the excuses and we don't want business from buyers as unethical as YOU are. We didn't want your money after the sale was closed and we don't want it now. We didn't ask for it, this was YOUR decision, and we will kindly refund you anything you rashly decided to pay... WHEN we get the chance. We are busy with other things. Your repeated emails are actually delaying our chance to do anything ELSE, which will, in turn, delay your refund as well.

Pinkie didn't reply after that one. I thought she'd taken the hint. My plan was to fully refund her the following morning. However, in the belief that it's best to always know your enemies, I decided to do some research on her that night. I knew the little city in Arkansas which she lives in, and since she was kind enough to tell me about her family's pedigree, I knew to look for individuals with her same last name. I figured that with a neurotic personality like that, she couldn't be married, and it turned out that I was right!

By now I had brought the other seller into the fold and reported my findings to her:

Pinkie apparently works and lives in the little town of XXXXXX, Arkansas, population 52,000 (give or take). She suffers from, I venture to guess, big-fish-in-little-pond syndrome. She was the "Assistant to the Mayor of Community Development" there, but was (apparently) recently promoted to be Director of Community Development and works with HUD (low-income housing). She also has the dubious distinction of participation in [Amazingly Ridiculous Sounding Celebration of Some Kind]. YES! I am not kidding. Here is the link:

[a link to the Amazingly Ridiculous Sounding Celebration of Some Kind]

Since there are only 32 people who work in XXXXXX City Hall, I'm thinking she isn't half as important as she thinks she is. However, the [college name] is stationed there. They have 10,000 students there. Here at USF we have a student pop of 54,000. And, of course, we have many other colleges here as well. I'm beginning to get a picture of the size of this town.

Perhaps we can assume that XXXXXX is a suburb and give Pinkie the credit of being Queen of the Burbs. :D

Pinkie's father is (my best guess) Judge XXX XXXXX. Of course XXXXX might be her married name, but with her attitude, I somehow doubt it. So .... if Judge XXX is her dad, get a load of THIS article:

[a link to a story about his upholding the law that allows toddlers of the opposite sex to get married in Arkansas]

That would make her brother XXXX XXXXX:

[a link to the law firm her brother works for with a picture of his cherubic, smiling face]
Now, the other seller had been bullied into going along with Pinkie the last time. She had allowed Pinkie to complete the sale, and had sent her a solid gold gemstone ring. At this point, the seller discovered that Pinkie had just opened a PayPal complaint against her for non-receipt of goods. However, this seller had sent the ring with a delivery confirmation slip and when she looked it up on the USPS site, she found that Pinkie HAD received the ring.

This was getting better and better.

The next morning, I logged into PayPal to arrange the refund to Pinkie. I was almost disappointed, because she hadn't sent me any more spittle-flecked rabid commentary. But lo and behold, I discovered that she had reported me to PayPal! Here's what she wrote in her opening complaint:

Seller was paid, and after receiving payment has blatantly refused to deliver the items or refund payment. This matter will be referred to the Pinellas County Office of Consumer Affairs for criminal fraud prosecution should a full refund not be received immediately.

Now this was really to good to be true, because I knew something that Pinkie didn't know. I knew that I have the last word if I refund her the money, because at that point the case is closed and there are no new notes added to the file. So I wrote:

[Pinkie's Real Name], as you know, I have a series of your emails and everything is documented via Ebay. Lying to PayPal (an extension of Ebay) will get you nowhere and could result in a suspension of your account. You purchased two items and never paid for them despite repeated invoices from us. After 8 days, we reported you to Ebay. We continued to send daily invoices. After 8 more days, we closed the transaction, and you received two strikes against you via Ebay.

That night you realized you couldn't shirk your obligations without consequences, and you discovered the two strikes. In an attempt to manipulate the situation, you made the payment THEN, after the sale was null and void.

We told you we'd refund you when we had the opportunity. We also told you that this was unacceptable behavior on your part. You tried this same ploy on [other seller who is currently laughing hysterically over the whole scenario] and on at least one other seller (according to your feedback). How long do you think such unprofessional and scummy behavior will be tolerated?

I'll bet Judge XXX and brother XXXXX would be disappointed. Surely the board of commissioners for the tiny City of XXXXXX would be shocked, and if you behave this way all the time you undoubtedly won't be asked to continue to volunteer for the prestigious ...er, what is it called? Is this possibly correct: [Amazingly Ridiculous Sounding Celebration of Some Kind]? Strange hobbies you have up there in XXXXXX, Arkansas.

Then I refunded her the monies with a final parting shot:

Here's the money back, which you sent after the sales were voided. Again, we would never welcome the monies from such an unethical buyer. Of course with all the crazed emails you sent to us, we will be happy to forward them to anyone who is interested.

During this time, I was urging the other seller to contact Ebay or PayPal (which are sister companies) with both of our stories so that Pinkie could be dealt with effectively. The other seller couldn't figure out how to get through so I finally called and spoke to a PayPal representative. He reviewed both files and refunded the other seller the money so that she wouldn't have to continue to be, as he put it, 'harassed' by Pinkie.

I have yet to hear from Pinkie, who serves on the very prestigious committee overseeing the famous celebration in her small town, which seems to advocate a sexual act on a reptile.

Peace?

Peace at last.

For any of us in any form of retail, we feel a certain wryness when we sing about peace during the holidays.

We also wonder how the concept of peace applies to our everyday lives. I recently gave a mortal business enemy a Christmas Card with the word "Peace" engraved in gilded script across the front of it, thinking "...if only!" I wonder if he got the message: I can only hope it works subliminally.

And now that it's the first day of the year, it's eerily quiet. All emails have stopped. All Ebay transactions and last minute running about is over.

In many ways, however, peace is our enemy. This year ushers in an economic recession at best, which may turn into a depression at worst. My primary business is being heavily affected, and many other businesses are suffering, too.

By nature, I am not a peaceful person. Oh, I believe in peace with my fellow man! But to sit about quietly? I need to be busy and I am frightened that this January will be a little too peaceful for my taste.

One interruption I don't welcome is the lawsuit I must enact against my former friend and tenant, who owes me a little over $4,000. But I am at peace knowing that the home she and her drugged-out son destroyed is completely fixed up and beautiful inside: It looks like a model home of what mobile homes should look like.

The home is completely drywalled, clean, neat, and has a new tenant who can't believe her good fortune. She has fixed up the home so beautifully that not only does it feel warm and cozy, but even *I* would happily move in immediately - no questions asked.

And unlike my former and ungrateful friend, this new tenant delights in the fact that she has a new hot water heater, two new airconditioners, and a washer and dryer. In fact, she has become rather entrepreneurial and is charging her fellow neighbors $5 a load if they wish to use her laundry facilities!

My little ebay business sped up drastically around Christmas time, but I fear it will be flatlining for the next couple of weeks. And my primary business is limping along fitfully.

However, this is the time to get back to writing my book, exercising, designing a belated Christmas gift for my mother, projects for my house, and perhaps polishing up my resume. A friend and I are currently working on creating a surprise for my son: A massive re-haul of his bedroom while he's away for a week.

What will you be doing to start out the New Year? And what are your feelings about it? Will 2008 be better or worse than 2007?

Happy New Year to every one of you (as long as you're one of the good guys). May this year surprise us with success and startle us with a profitable workload!

Why Some Men are Threatened by Hillary

As a conservative woman, I dislike some of Hillary Clinton's policies. I was also disappointed when she chose to "put up and shut up" when it came to her husband's peccadillos. I saw this as a sign of weakness, and I dislike weakness. She is also pro-abortion (I am not) and tends to favor more social programs than I do.

These are my reservations about Hillary Clinton, and I am always happy to discuss them with anyone.

However, there are many men who are self-styled 'conservatives' who are hardly conservative in their approach to Hillary. Such men speak about and refer to Hillary as they never would about her male counterparts. Instead of behaving as intelligent gentlemen, they are instantly reduced to white trash when Hillary's name is mentioned.

Why is this?

I've seen the t-shirts that say "Hillary, get in the kitchen and make me a sandwich." I haven't seen any that tell Barack Obama "Barack, go back to Africa" or ask Mitt Romney "Mitt: Where are your other wives?" And even if such t-shirts existed, those sayings wouldn't be attacking the candidates from a sexual perspective, as Hillary is being attacked.

On the internet, the name Hillary Clinton is often associated with such sexist put-downs as bitch, c***, whore, etc. However, you'd be hard-pressed to hear any of the male candidates called a prick, a dick, or even an asshole. Their beliefs are attacked, their sex is not.

I've heard Glenn Beck (who I otherwise respect for the most part) do an imitation of Hillary in a shrill fishwife voice. I've heard Rush snidely refer to her repeatedly as Mrs. Clinton, as if she has no claim to the throne based on her own merits.

Of course Rush makes other less oblique references to her, as well. Today, as I was radio-surfing, I heard him state that the only reason Hillary (and all women of her generation) went to college was to find a husband! And yet, I remember reading that Hillary was a brilliant scholar. I also remember that she graduated: Why graduate if your only goal is to catch a man? And what of the women who went to college after they married? Was their goal to find two husbands?

As the snot-nosed bully on the playground would say, "You're just a girl!"

What about Elizabeth Dole and Margaret Thatcher? What about Ann Coulter, darling of the right? Are they only girls, too?

This conservative male attitude is serving as a real eye-opener to many of us conservative females. If the worst that can be said of Hillary is a sexist put-down, obviously being female is a greater sin than being liberal. And this places many conservative males only slightly higher than the Muslim fundamentalists who believe in subjugating women through severe restrictions, female genital mutilation, and societal pressures.

How many women can remain quiet, knowing what their sons, husbands, and fathers are saying about Hillary? Do they not realize that such disdain is also levelled at them? For surely a man who believes that being a woman is a greater sin than liberalism will also see the women in his family as being a little less-than-human.

My mother is only a little older than Hillary. She and many other women of her generation didn't go to college to find a husband. They went to learn, better themselves, and come out as richer human beings. Having questing minds, these women worked their way into the workplace, sometimes doing the job better than their male predecessors. Many stayed at home, where the work was even harder.

These women enriched our lives due to the concepts they learned and the experiences they had in college and in the business world. It may shock some men to hear that many of these women became successful not simply because of the men they slept with, but due to their own merits instead. In fact, my mother just became a published author whose book can be found on Amazon and in bookstores.

Oh, but that's right: She's just a girl.

So why are some men so bent on attacking Hillary's sex? I had thought such barbarism went out in the 1970s. However, apparently such disdain runs deep in the psyche of less-intelligent males.

Do you remember the schoolyard bully that I mentioned earlier? Of course you do: Every school had at least one. Well, what do you remember of that bully? You probably remember he was pretty stupid and no one really liked him.

As we grow older, we realize bullies picked on others because they felt so terribly inadequate. In order to feel better about themselves, bullies need to view all others as lesser-beings.

Obviously the men attacking Hillary in this way feel threatened. And they're not threatened by her ideas, or they'd be attacking the ideas instead. No, they're merely threatened by her sex: "The Little Woman has arisen and she's uppity! Doesn't she know her place? Her place is beneath and behind us, or we will find ourselves last in line!"

The bully's solution is to attempt to denigrate Hillary in any way he can. And if Hillary can be treated this way, what will happen to the rest of us women who dare to state our sometimes unpopular views? Are we destined to be bullied, too?

As Margaret Thatcher once said "If you want anything said, ask a man. If you want something done, ask a woman."

Oh, but that's right: She was just a girl.

The Lack of Shopping This Season

Today I'm not going to bemoan the commercialization of Christmas, or how we have to use the word 'holiday' in substitution of the various holy days we celebrate this time of year.

But, I do a lot of shopping at discount outlets for goodies to sell on Ebay and I have to say I've been shocked to see how few people are shopping at this time of year. And, those who are shopping are carrying far less parcels than they did last year.

And yet, as the government cheerfully tells us, employment is at an all-time low! What they neglect to mention is that people who used to have high-end high-paying jobs are now employed at McDonald's.

Yup! Unemployment's at an all-time low: So are our salaries.

So it's no wonder that when you walk through Macy's you can hear your footsteps echoing throughout the vast cavern of glittering holiday-themed outerwear and assorted tchochkes. However, try to elbow your way through a Dollar Tree to get a simple pack of tissue paper, and you'll find out where everyone is buying stocking stuffers this year.

Even our local outlet stores are offering additional discounts off their already low prices and many people are agreeing to forgo gifts this season. In fact, my parents, Sonosaur and I have an agreement to go out for a very elegant meal at a 5-star restaurant, instead. It makes sense for us, since we all have what we already want and need: What's the use in receiving one more sweater, one more necktie, one more Christmas ornament?

The shoppers look different, too. They have an almost haggard look about them, as if they are worn out from pinching pennies too fiercely. There are few smiling faces, no carefree swinging of bags, and a look of intense concentration as they carefully compare merchandise: "Should I spend the extra $20 for this sweater? Is it really worth the extra money?"

Perhaps as we near Christmas, we'll see a difference. But for now, there is a dearth of happy Holiday shoppers.

Why I Didn't Write Last Week: The Mobile Home

As most of you recall, I had a nightmare tenant who had been a former friend. When she was evicted (read more about that decision here), she left destruction behind. I've had to hire two people and the three of us have been working on fixing the entire wreck.

Here are some pictures of what she and her son did (I'll be posting the 'after' photos when we're finished). I made them to document her destruction for court, but the notes are specifically addressed to her. This is the Augean Stables, trust me.

The funny thing is that I had never wanted to be a landlord. This was supposed to be only temporary, and I was helping a friend out. As my grandmother always said, no good deed goes unpunished.

The mobile home park management says they’ve brought this repeatedly to her attention. From the way the glass lies, it is apparent that it was broken from within the home. Shards are laying about outside.






Here are a couple shots of the brand-new carpet which had been installed for her. Please note that these pictures are easily enlarged and do illustrate what she already knows to be true: This is a true mess that will need to be steam-cleaned. Potentially, the carpet may be ruined because we cannot be sure if that long black stain can be cleaned, as we don’t know what it consists of. Due to the state of the carport, I’m sure it’s possible that it’s motor oil.




Here an entire kitchen cabinet door has been ripped off and is nowhere to be found. I have been forced to go buy 4 doors to replace these doors, as it is impossible to find another door that will match the original three.




These holes are not due to termites, as my pest control experts could testify. They’re due to someone having applied tape to the ceiling in places. In other places, it’s just obviously been picked at. Because both Mom and son were on drugs, it was probably done while they were high and sketchy.


Now we come to the new closet which had been installed for her in the living room (she 'needed' more storage space). Apparently someone had gone inside the closet and exerted a great amount of force outwards, resulting in the entire wall being pulled away. Seams were ripped open, and cracks were evident. A hole was punched into the base of the closet.



Now we come to the satanic (and just strange) drawings which occupy one of the panels in the bedroom. Again, this was freshly painted before she moved in and we had a discussion about her son drawing on the walls. This discussion didn’t prevent him from sticking up rock bands, sexually explicit lyrics, and satanic pictures on another panel in there, however, as the next picture shows.

Incidentally, many of the brand new knobs were ripped off, and one was dented and mangled beyond use. I will now have to purchase new knobs and hardware to replace what has been lost.



Here’s a shot of some of the garbage which she left behind. This is only what was between the refrigerator and kitchen counter…


They say a picture is worth a thousand words. So what does this filthy refrigerator say? The lady who is cleaning the place gagged over this one.


As I told her... thanks for the used toilet paper wadded up on the toilet paper dispenser. That was a particularly nasty surprise.