Thursday, December 24, 2015

Last Minute Christmas Shopping

My friend, Ruth, tipped me off that foxy Christmas wrap was to be found at the Dollar Tree. So I braved the crowds today to hunt through bins of wrapping paper (I found some!). As I was sifting through everything, an old woman toddled up next to me and started humming an off-key Christmas tune. All was well until she began talking to her imaginary friend, Roger, and squealed in excitement when she found what she was looking for. "Look Roger, look," she cried out happily to absolutely no one. Absolutely no one replied. This is what last minute shopping will do to you.

Thursday, December 10, 2015

Going Back to College?

So as I consider going back to college and getting another Masters, this time in Psychology, I had nightmares all night last night. They are the typical nightmares: Finding out I have another class I've forgotten all about, discovering the final exam is only days away (or in the next hour) or that the teacher is vicious.

The only light at the end of the tunnel: One of the professors said in irritation "Each generation of you students gets dumber and dumber" (I've heard this in real life from several professors). I did some calculations and thought "Well THIS makes me the smartest student in the room, then."

Thursday, December 03, 2015

Leeks vs. Onions

I've been cooking with leeks a lot lately, and I've come to the conclusion that I don't like them. They're as weak as a wavering politician. Leeks lack the guts to be onions.