I saw Miami Vice over the weekend. Apparently others did too, since it took in $25.2 million. It sucked.
As the movie opened, the first thing I thought was "Wow! Hollywood's trying to bring back white trash hair!" Colin Farrell, who plays Sonny, was sporting the same 'do we see in trailer parks across the nation: down to the shoulders, slicked back into a gooey, spackled mess with hair gel. He also has grown out a mustache worthy of any white supremacist. Could someone else have pulled this look off? Maybe... But Colin Farrell sure couldn't!
Eventually he was placed with an unbelievable love interest. There was no chemistry between the characters, and her sudden transformation from ruthless business woman to a bashful sex kitten is simply silly.
I think there is more time devoted to boring sex scenes between the different characters than there is time devoted to the plot. Sure, sex is great! Sex sells! So then do something worthy of 9 1/2 Weeks! I was yawning in my popcorn.
The plot is also the basic drug plot. For me, that is the most boring theme anyone could work with. It's worse than mafia plotlines! Well, no, it couldn't be worse. But it sure wasn't good! The guy I was with wanted to see it for the fantastic cars. Those lasted for the first 5 minutes, and after that, nothing else impressive rolled across the screen.
Miami Vice is hardly memorable. If you want to go see a great movie, and you don't want to try Lady in the Water, go see Monster House. It's not just for kids, and you'll lose yourself in the movie. For some of us, that's the only reason we go.