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Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Barrister Koffi

Wow! I have a scammer that is directly contacting ME on Ex Boyfriend Jewelry (where I sell some used jewelry that I own).

I feel privileged! This morning I got 4 messages from Koffi, who was initially 'interested' in a necklace I'm selling. He wrote:

GOODDAY,I REALLY LOVE THAT NECKLACE OF YOURS,I WILL LIKE YOU TO GET BACK TO ME WITH YOUR FINAL AMOUNT FOR THE NECKLACE,REALLY LOVE IT SO MUCH ,GUESS MY WIFE WILL LOVE ME MORE IF I GET IT FOR HER,,DONT YOU THINK SO!!!!LOL
please kindly reply me back on my private email address
barrister_koffi36@yahoo.com
Barrister Koffi

Yeah, the "barrister" actually LOLed me. But we're buds now, sharing a joke. Yup! I'm betting your wife will love you more. LOL!

Then he discovered an even higher priced item of mine and got REALLY excited. He wrote:

GOODDAY,PLEASE GET BACK TO ME AS SOON AS POSSIBLE WITH YOU PAYMENT DETAILS,MY WIFE REALLY LOVE IT SO SO MUCH,YOU KNOW AM SO BUSY AS YOU CAN SEE AM A BARRISTER,PLEASE ITS VERY URGENT..THANK YOU

BARRISTER KOFFI
You know, you'd think these Nigerian scammers might come up with a different handle. When you google "Barrister Koffi", you get pages of references to the scams attached to this name. What's wrong with good old "Barrister Smith", for instance?

Anyway, my reply to his first email was basic. But the second one (and his pointing out that he's a barrister) forced my hand. I wrote back:

Of course! I am more than happy to hear that you're interested in this item. But let me ask you: How do you have so much money if you work as a barrister at Starbucks? I hear they pay only minimum wage. Maybe I should reconsider working there!

Anyway, if you'll give me your email address, I'll be happy to send you a PayPal bill for the amount. Thanks!

(If I get a reply, I'll update this post.)

My first question (which is really rhetorical): Do these Nigerian scams really work anymore? Aren't they tired of being scammed in return?

And my second one: How can I really stick it to him? Any ideas?

6 comments:

The Lazy Iguana said...

Get the scammer to send you the fake check. He will not want to do a paypal transaction, the scam works on fake cashiers checks or fake money orders.

So agree to a check payment. Suggest that the matter is very urgent so you need the payment via express overnight shipping - because overnight shipping is the most expensive.

Then lose the check. OOPS! It never arrived. Send the email yourself. Say you were waiting for the check, and it did not arrive. Was it sent overnight or two day?

Then ask for another one. Because the first one never showed up. Get it overnight again.

Now the scammer has paid for two overnight packages to be sent to you. With real money.

If you think you can pull it off, lose that check too. You were on the way to the bank to deposit it, and send back the "change" and the item - when you had a nasty car accident! The fire dept had to come to extract you from the car. And then there was a fire! It was really scary, but the nice firemen put it out. In the process the check was ruined. Please send another one by the usual preferred shipping method.

And then when the scammer is getting irritated, deposit the check then tell him you are waiting for the check to clear before you send anything. As soon as the check clears - and you have the cash in your hand, you will gladly send the change and item off.

You will never hear from them again. The checks will come back stamped "counterfeit" and the money will be removed from your account. No problem.

Now you have your very own counterfeit check - suitable for framing.

The scammer has to pay for the overnight shipping - which has to be expensive. Even if they pay for international two or three day shipping it costs money. Money they never get back.

I would not use my real name or real address - obviously. Use a business address, or a Mailbox USA address or something.

Deb said...

SPamming is never fun or nice.

Groovy Mom said...

Oprah managed to dig up a few people who had been victims of Nigerian scams not too long ago. I was floored that anyone could fall for it. They seemed like intelligent normal people too.

Uncle Joe said...

I have a great uncle named Barrister Latte.
But he's not Nigerian.
He's a wise man who lives atop a huge mountain in Hawaii.

Paul said...

Here comes the editor in me, raising its ugly head: A barrister is a lawyer (of the British kind). I think you're looking for the word "Barista," the coffee preparer/server who works in coffee joints.

By the way, the word Barista has only been in use about 20 years, maybe a little longer. It's Italian.

Saur♥Kraut said...

Paul, I realize that. I was attempting to provoke him. ;o) Apparently I got you, too.

Unca Joe, :D

Groovy, sad, isn't it?

Deb, no - but it's pretty funny when you can read about scammers who have the tables turned on them.

Lazy, excellent advice. Too bad he didn't bite. :-P