Tuesday, February 06, 2007

Your Questions, My Answers, & Those Crazy Astronauts!

Dave Away From Home asked for a link to the Superbowl Commercials, so here it is!

Meow asked how the devastation was in Florida, and was I close to it? The answer is that we're in the Tampa Bay area, which is about 2 hours away from Deland. Here's a map (click on it to view it in a larger screen):

The morning that I awoke to the news, I was quite surprised because the storm had passed right over us before it hit the Deland area. Obviously there were no real problems, then. The destruction is amazing: Some buildings are flattened as if a giant hand reached down from the sky and smashed them down. Others have some interior walls remaining. One home had it's kitchen intact, but little else. Since the storm hit at night, and some people slept through the warnings, 20 are dead so far.

And have you read about Astronaut Lisa M. Nowak? She's been arrested for battery and attempted kidnapping after she hunted down the girlfriend of her lover, fellow astronaut William Oefelein. Now Bill's okay looking, but he's hardly supermodel quality. I can only suppose his bedroom skills must be astounding, since he's inspired quite a catfight.

Lisa is married, according to her NASA biography. However, their picture of her is obviously very outdated, and her marriage may also be.

Anyway, she realized that Bill was flying to Orlando to meet his other lover, Colleen Shipman. So, "when she found out that Shipman was flying to Orlando from Houston, Nowak decided to confront her, according to the arrest affidavit. Nowak raced from Houston to Orlando wearing diapers so she wouldn’t have to stop to urinate, authorities said."

You know, I can only hope that old Bill is a fetishist, because this gives the reader a very unattractive picture. Speaking of unattractive pictures, have a look at this:

Looks like she's on crack, doesn't it? I guess that's what you look like after sitting in wet diapers for 8 hours.

What is extra creepy: She was found to have in her possession a four-inch folding buck knife, a new steel mallet, black gloves, rubber tubing, plastic garbage bags (perhaps to dispose of the body?)

Anyway, I think that Lisa apparently needs a lonnnng vacation. As for Bill, surely he deserves at least a slap on the wrist? Looks like the player got played.

I just saw a picture of Lisa that reminded me of Monica Cartwright, who played the part of the obsessed mad churchwoman in "The Witches of Eastwick". Is it just me, or do you see it, too?


Matt said...

I blogged about the astronaut too. She reminds me of the Runaway Bride of gossip fame last year.

Crazy-wise, I think she's about average. Her psychiatrist might want to change her medication but I'm sure she'll be ready soon for a FOURTH space walk.

Saur♥Kraut said...

Matt, Ahh, but how many other astronauts want to get into a space shuttle with this woman? My guess: Not many. I'll run over and check out your blog!

The Lazy Iguana said...

I have THE PERFECT post for this, but I already posted about my broken cat that is at the vet right now getting fixed. So Ill do it later.

Unless I think up something funnier first.

The Lazy Iguana said...

OK - updated my blog with my perfect wacky astronaut post! Grade A material there.

For the rest of the week I will have that "Bizarre Love Triangle" song by New Order.

Think this lady was listening to that song over and over while going in her space diapers?

Saur♥Kraut said...

LI, I just checked out your site! I'll go check back now. I can only begin to speculate what she was thinking during that 8-10 hr. drive!

The Lazy Iguana said...

Cleo will be fine. By the way, ever get my email about the full moon shark valley thing?

Saur♥Kraut said...

LI, no! Send it again, please?

Some Random Girl said...

she definetly took her crazy pill didn't she??? Diapers? WTF? I am appalled!

Senor Caiman said...


She looks like a transsexual.

You think the guy could have found someone better, he must have bad breath.

Excellent post.

Meow said...

Thanks for the info about the tornados. Obviously I have no idea as to what's where when it comes to the US !! So glad you are all OK, anyway !!
That astronaut story is so bizarre. Can't believe she wore a diaper ... that's just weird.
Oh well, I guess Bill just likes them odd !!
Take care, Meow

Anonymous said...

do you and lazy call each other every night and see what the other one is posting about? it seems to be on the same subject here and there

as for lisa, i think in the after picture, she's just growing out her bangs? the article was not clear on whether or not she was having an affair with that guy or just wants to

The Lazy Iguana said...

QZ - its a FL thang. I posted my crazy lady post just because this story was too amusing to ignore. And it DID happen here in my State!