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Monday, November 06, 2006

Heap Big Prestige!

Originally I wrote: "Sorry! I'm just way too busy today to write anything. The phones are going NUTS!!!"

However, as I'm on the phone, I'm skimming through ebay (I often do this. It beats fidgeting with a pencil!) and I came across this ad:

"Welcome to my ebay,now you can see a beautiful and wonderful artware,the item is very value .look at its figure,it is nobler and enthralling,it will give you the elegance and made you exalted. what magnetic item,please don't miss it,it will be a good present for you or for your friend,also it will give you more fortune and good luck."

This makes the book editor in me come out as a roaring lion (yes, it's something I've done in my checkered past). My fingers desperately itch for a red markup pen, and I immediately want to start slaying poor punctuation, radically altering grammar, and surgically removing horrific sentence structure.

ARGH!

If you are from another country and you wish to sell something to the English-speaking part of the world, you might want to bone up a little on it. First, (of course) the grammar is horrifically off-putting.

Second, they are marketing to westerners using eastern methods! After all, the western mentality is not geared toward a strong belief in "luck". Also, the average American is not sitting around saying to himself "Hmm! I need to buy something to make me exalted and enhance my prestige!" Of course they may think it (which is why so many BMWs and Porsches are sold every year) but no one wants to hear it said so blatantly. It makes your skin crawl!

I am thinking of writing to the seller and asking if it will also make me ooze sensuality and give me heap big prestige. That's what I'd like right now, more than anything.

12 comments:

The Lazy Iguana said...

I hate phones.

Debbie said...

You and my oldest stepdaughter would get along grandly! She is great at correcting grammar and pronunciations. Does keep on on their toes! I just upgraded to Foxfire 2.0 and it has a spell checker now that is just wonderful. It tells me every word I type wrong! Really keeps my fingers watching what they type!

Ed Abbey said...

That was just plain hard to read.

EmmaSometimes said...

hehehe. I've seen those. You should email him!!

I see that happen a lot in my specialty of china, a pattern by Crown Ducal, called Adaptation of Old English Ivy is commonly refered to as Old English Joy. The scrolly font of the backstamp looks to be the culprit.

But my favorite typo was a man selling and listing by complete mistake, complete with a disclaiming apology, an antique book, "The Book Of Moron". NICE.

Eddo said...

HAHA! I agree, but I never shop at ebay because I am always afraid I will get junk.

Anonymous said...

I bean tinkin bout sellin somtin on eabay. ani advise wuld bea helping.

The Lazy Iguana said...

Uhhh...what the heck was that thing anyway? A fish tea pot? Who wants to drink from a fish tea pot?

Badoozie said...

bone up? don't you mean hone up? lolololol...sorry couldn't resist

Jenn said...

I love this seller. He is magnificently proficient in Engrish. Fa Rah Rah Rah Rah...

Meow said...

I so agree with you. I would love to attack it with a red pen !! I have also done some book editing in my past, as well as they pedantic typist coming out in me (was that spelt correctly !!!). I always find it interesting how non-English speakers seem to think things can be translated word for word ... it just doesn't work.
Have a great week.
Take care, Meow

Old Man Rich said...

heh. I'm sure you already ooze sensuality.

Carrie said...

Yes as a published editor myself, I certainly understand the need to correct writing. However, even with the errors everyone seemed to comprehend the message. I guess that is why content is more important than conventions on the Florida Writes test.