Monday, March 10, 2014


I recently saw a heavily tattooed shirtless guy strolling down the street, which made me reflect on how nature makes dangerous or unpleasant things very colorful as a way of saying "hands off, you don't want this."
CHRIS: Do you have a tattoo?
ME: NO I don't have a tattoo. What kind of weird question is that?
CHRIS: Well you SEEM like a girl that would have a tattoo.

Oddly I once thought of having a tat. I was 16 and my best friend's mom was willing to sign off on the consent form. I ALMOST did it. Almost. And yet if I had, to this day I would still have a unicorn on my shoulder. Thank goodness I chickened out.
A grimy girl covered in prison tats walks into an elegant business office with a strapless midriff tee that reads "Sex Education Instructor" and Daisy Duke shorts.

Ew. Just... ew.