Sunday, May 28, 2006

The Best of Saur

I am gaining so many new readers that I felt I should take a moment to share "The Best of Saur", so that you know what you're getting into. It is said that I am known for my wit, writing, insight into the human condition, big heart and yet complete lack of tolerance for fools. I hope so. I am definately an equal-opportunity offender, sometimes without intending to be.

I am the product of New York parents, but I was raised here in the heart of Florida. I've had many marvellous and unusual opportunities which have given me unique insights into the world (and life in general).

I have all types of friends and readers, who range in interests and personality. The only commonality is that there is something which brings them back. What is it? I can't say. But perhaps this will give you some insight into me.

These stories are listed in the order in which they were written, not in alphabetical order. Some are repeated in a couple places because they fall into a couple categories.

The Business World

Customers From Hell
The Biker Babe
How I Climbed Out of Poverty
The Shop Dog
The Doll Maker
I Hate Starbucks
Strip Clubs: The New Business Meeting Place
Drive Thrus
Sexual Harassment at Tastee Twistee
My Experience With the New Lie Detector
Do Career Women Make Rotten Wives?
Recommending the Wrong Person
Selfish, Careless Bosses

Hollywood, Pop Culture, & Entertainment

I Nominate Tom Cruise as Moron of the Year
John Lennon
Mel Gibson: Racist
Fashion Guide to Choosing a Mate
The Fall Color Scheme: Smoky but Not
Virtual Kids
Moronic Radio Stunt Kills Woman
Heroes With Blemishes
Worst Movie Accents of All Times


Diamonds are a Girl’s Worst Enemy
Saur's Recommended Jewelry
The Diamond Merchants Lie

Kid's Issues

Survival of the Fittest
Disciplining Kids
Hysterically Funny or Awkwardly Painful
Discrimination at KFC
The Verbal Abuser
No Santa? Shocking!
Barbie Girl
Parents Punished for Kids Playing Hooky
Molester Gets Plea Bargain
Debra LaFave: The Molestor’s Role Model
The Bad Mother
Little Man
Kids Out of Control (KOOCs)
Things You Should Never Have to Ask Your Teen
Should the HPV Vaccine be Mandatory?
Stay FAR Away From the Bridge to Terabithia!
The Need to Control Child Molesters

My Family

My Incredible Father
Pranking the Parents
Pranking the Parents Part Deux
Family Ties (That Bind and Gag!)
My Mom
Dinner at The 5-Star Restaurant
My Dad's Surprise Party
The Christmas Fart

My Friends

How Dumb Was She?
Kitten's Wedding
Crazy Ozma
The Mexican Surprise Party
Fortunate Friends
The Big 4-0 (and my friends)
My Geography Lesson
Stairway to Heaven
Life is a Fair (by Greg)

My Life & My Interests

Heavy Metal
Apartment Living Nightmares
The Drama Teacher
Candles: Their History & Usage
How to Make Candles at Home
The Weeki Wachee Mermaids (& Video)
Saur's Top 10 Reasons Why Heavy Metal is Better Than Rap
Scene From a Restaurant
My Tangle With NASA
How I Climbed Out of Poverty
Sir Lawrence Alma-Tadema
Lesson Learned
RATS: Apocalypse Now!
The Weirdest Marriage Proposal
6 Strange Things About Me
A Funny Thing Happened on the Way To...
My Resignation from
I'm Too Pushy?
Your Questions Answered About Me!
Self Portrait
The Ferret Cage
My True Ghost Story

Politics & News: Florida

Florida's New "Kill Bill Law"
Tampa's Corrupt Government
Florida’s Alligator Problem
The Local School Bus / Terrorist Incident
Florida’s Worst Public Defender?
Katherine Harris
Gabe Cazares: Dead at 86
Florida's Corporate Welfare
The Big Grouper Scandal
Lethal Injection: Let's Try Something Else

Politics & Issues on a Larger Scale

China's Continued Ban on Free Speech
Illegal Immigrants & Child Sex Abuse
Increased Funding for Africa
Aids Funding for Africa
America Losing Key Jobs
Doctors: Just What Did Their Transcripts Read?
Prison Reform Needed
How to Fix the Oil Crisis
The Bird Flu
Pork Barrel Spending
The Dangerous Encroachment Upon Our Liberties
More of the Encroachments Upon Our Liberties
The Muslim Cartoons
Should Churches and Charities be Taxed?
Congress Approves Increased Debt (More Pork Barrel Spending)
What Should be Regulated? -and- Concentration Camps HERE!
How Much Should We Weigh a Candidate's Past?
America The Fat
The Flag Burning Amendment Loses
Alcoholism is NOT a Disease
No Liquids or Gels
Addicts Are Responsible for Their Own Behavior
The Moken
Business Freedom of Speech
Perverts in Politics
Voting With Kitty Litter Convictions
Why the Republicans Lost 2006
America's Lack of Deductive Reasoning
The Cost of Saving Idiots
The "Free Puppy" Scam
Government Claims the Right to Open Your Mail
Wiretapping: Oops! Nevermind!
Iraqi Refugees?
The Confederate Flag
Should Smokers be Allowed to Smoke in Public Places?
Treating Female Politicians Equally
Sex Change Operations: Are They Choice or Necessity?
Intrinsic Problems With Veterans' and Military Health Care


Racism & Reverse Racism
Racism in America
The Lingerie Customers From Hell
Walmart Racially Discriminating in Tampa?
Black Males Need Saving?


The Perfect Man
Gay Marriage
Mixing Lunch
What is Respecting the Dead?
What is Love?
Celebrating a Divorce
My Employee’s Addicted Daughter
Do Career Women Make Rotten Wives?
Some Top Reasons to Leave a Relationship The Little Gray Lie
The Foster Baby
Morning With a Crack Addict
Why Buy the Cow?
Is Chivalry Dead?


Missionaries & Proselytizing
People Who Misuse “God”
Holy Water
Frankincense, Myrrh, Biblical Lore Surrounding the Birth of Jesus
Faux Christians
The Biblical Canon + Abraham
The Woman in the Pantsuit at Church
Catholic Hideaway
Should Churches and Charities be Taxed?
A Muslim’s Conversion to Christianity
The Separation of Church and State & The New Shantar Religion
7-Eleven Hymns of the Modern Church
Pat Robertson: False Prophet
Does the Bible Condone Slavery?

Saur as Your Tour Guide

Clearwater Beach
The Burbs
St. Petersburg
Hunting Dove
The Strawberry Festival
Car Show
Mutt Strut at Honeymoon Island
The Beginning of the Trip to St. Augustine
The Trip to St. Augustine, Part 2
The Trip to St. Augustine, Part 3
The Trip to St. Augustine, Part 4
The Trip to St. Augustine, Part 5
The Trip to St. Augustine: The Final Chapter
The Doggy Cafe
Lazy Sunday Mornings
Saur Meets The Lazy Iguana & Tours Miami
The Peacock at Breakfast

The John & Esme Fiction Series

Esme & John, Part 1
Esme & John, Part 2
A Moment in the Life of Esme & John
Dinner at Suegos

Etc. (I Can't Categorize These)

Shampoos of Ages Past
Conversation at Dinner
Hottentots & Spaetzle
The Origins of Valentine’s Day
Letter to the Woman in the Black Hummer
Idiot Labels
Bad Art
Easter Bonnets
You Never Know Who That Stranger Is
Panhandling Perfected
Saur Greeting Cards
For Your Protection
Fitting Room Etiquette

Please don't leave comments in those individual posts, as I rarely get around to checking them and probably wouldn't reply when I eventually got around to seeing them. Just drop a comment or question in here, and I'll be happy to answer!


tsb said...

LOL and for those of us who have been faithful readers, it's a refresher course in everything "Saur" .....:)

Saur♥Kraut said...

TSB, thanks, sweetie. I have greatly enjoyed interracting with you. I'm glad FTS introduced us!

michelle said...

I cannot believe you have written so many posts! To think, I have read every single one! You still manage to surprise me. Thanks for your help on sweetnsaur. It has been over a week, but I jumped in and posted a new thread last night. Of course, I waited until you cleaned things up a bit. Yes, I know, call me a chicken.

Jamie Dawn said...

It's that "complete lack of tolerance for fools" that I share in common with you. :)

Keep on offending one and all; it's your style!!
Hey, if it's the truth... it's the truth. You have the nerve to say it, and that's a gooood thing.

The Lazy Iguana said...

How did you find all this stuff? Did you go through every single post to this blog and group them into topics?

I am FAR TOO LAZY to ever do anything like this.

michelle said...

Saur will be away for a day or two. She will check in as soon as she can and hopes you are all having a FUN and SAFE holiday weekend!!

Senor Caiman said...


When I see all the words you've typed here it really makes me wish I hadn't sat between two cheerleaders in typing class.

The Lazy Iguana said...

Yea right Mr. Gator. I believe you.

Brainless cheerleaders rule :)

Miss Cellania said...

You've given me a lot to read here. I'm going to have to bookmark just this post! But I will get caught up eventually.

AQ said...

michelle said...
Everyone: Saur will be away for a day or two. She will check in as soon as she can and hopes you are all having a FUN and SAFE holiday weekend!!

I hope everything is okay. Have a safe Memorial Day!

angel, jr. said...

That's a lot of reading. I'll get around to it eventually!!

Phats said...

your icon looks like the lady from Romey and Michelle's HS reunion haha! the fashion one

Badoozie said...

good grief girl, that was a ton of work you did organizing all of this!! what a fantastic idea!

see ya round

Fred said...

Looks like I missed a few while on vacation. Off I go to read...

michelle said...

AQ and Everyone,
Saur is fine. Like me, she has a major project going on at home. While I am makeing home IMPROVEMENTS, Saur is making a FIX.

I will let her tell you the long and horrid story, but she is fine.

Beaver said...

This is great, Saur! I've started reading on these links. I think you should link this permanently on your sidebar for new readers.

Much love,


Beaver said...

Oh, yeah, and by the way, your spelling of saurkraut is correct.

In german, (where it's obviously from), there is no E.

Viel Liebe,


Eddo said...


I am just dropping in to say hi and that I haven't forgotten about you. I plan to catch up soon!

Much Love!

Meow said...

Hey there, just dropping by to say HI ... I have been neglecting many of my blog-friends lately, and am dropping by as many as possible, commenting, or just saying hi.
Hope you have a great week.
Take care, Meow

R2K said...

Arg sourco, just one more faceless corporate giant swallowing up the bloggosphere?

BarbaraFromCalifornia said...

Well, I am a fan of Saur, and think you can click on any of her posts and see her at her best!

Reverberate58 said...

This is a really neat way to do a post! I never think of my postings in catagories and would be hard pressed to come up with some! But I like that you did this. Makes it easy to skip the ones that go over my head. I am not quite able to hold my own on politics. They just confuse me!

Daniel Hoffmann-Gill said...

That's a lot of greatest hits...

Saur♥Kraut said...

Daniel, and you should hear me sing! ;o)

Reverb, glad you like it. I like making things easy to access for people; it comes from my marketing background, I suppose.

Barbara, Thank you very much, hon. And I, yours!

Alex, ahh, one can only hope. ;o)

Meow, I understand. You're busy, so am I right now. I'm happy to see you, though!

Eddo, I'm so glad you did. *hugs*

Beav, Hey! There's a neat factoid! Thanks! I mean, er, yeah! I knew that! And I was thinking about putting it in my sidebar. Now it's there, with both the link and text as a link. I'll keep it freshened up as time goes by. :D

Michelle, thanks for the help! You're doing great in Sweet N' Saur. Keep it up! You rock!

Fred, well, you did disappear (and were very missed) for quite a while!

Susie, ;o) See my note to Reverb. I guess that's why. After all, only I am responsible for my own publishing. I might as well do it right!

Phats, Yeah, but I'm meaner and smarter. :D Welcome!

Angel & Miss C, take your time. It's probably a novel's worth! Just read what you like. There's no quiz tomorrow.

AQ, thanks for the concern, sweetie. As you'll see from the post today (5/30) it's been a rough couple of days.

Lazy Iguana & Gator, How typically male. I don't know what I'd do without you neanderthals.

Lazy Iguana, I did a list like this before my surgery in November. I checked it and updated it, removing what I didn't like any more.

Jamie Dawn, thanks, hon! Your blog is another gem, so it's great praise (coming from you).

Mr. Fabulous said...

I'll tell you what keeps me coming back. You're smart, witty, sharp, caring, insightful, and fabulous!

Don't let it go to your head.

Three Score and Ten or more said...

I am so jealous, you and Patrick with your massive readership. (Even if you DO deserve it.)

Saur♥Kraut said...

3 Score & 10, thank you! Well, you'd have a bigger readership but you don't have as much time to blog. When you DO, it's worth the read, that's for sure!

Mr. F, thank you, thank you *blushing*